domenica, aprile 02, 2006
Una giornata al mare
Meravigliosa giornata di sole e mare. La prima giornata di primavera al mare con la bimba quest'anno.Impossibile non immortalare la Sella del Diavolo in tutto il suo splendore, sotto il sole di mezzogiorno a Cagliari.
April's Fool Day - Pesce d'Aprile
Ho voluto pubblicare un paio di articoli divertenti apparsi sulle pagine html che consulto costantemente. La notizia che mi ha fatto trasalire di più, poiché ero soprapensiero, è quella del kernel Linux in Windows Vista. Ci sono approdato leggendo il blog di un ex-dipendente Microsoft che è appena passato in Google (tale Robert Scoble Announcement, I?m going to Google ). Alla fine del suo articolo, annuncia candidamente "Update: did you see the Windows Vista news? Maybe I should have stayed at Microsoft!" e seguendo, appunto, il link sono arrivato a quella notizia del kernel Linux. Dopo un paio di secondi di atterrimento, leggendo di volata quelle oscure parole inglesi, ho capito che si trattava di un classico pesce d'aprile.
Esattamente come quello tentato in anticipo da N.S. giovedì pomeriggio in ufficio.
Bah...!
Sono un po' stanchino, la mamma non è ancora rientrata dall'addormentare la bimba ed io, come un pirla, non mi sono messo a vedere nemmeno un filmino. Mi sono accontentato di vedere Scrubs e basta.
Bah...! Basta scrivere per oggi.
Esattamente come quello tentato in anticipo da N.S. giovedì pomeriggio in ufficio.
Bah...!
Sono un po' stanchino, la mamma non è ancora rientrata dall'addormentare la bimba ed io, come un pirla, non mi sono messo a vedere nemmeno un filmino. Mi sono accontentato di vedere Scrubs e basta.
Bah...! Basta scrivere per oggi.
How to Win a Street Fight - WikiHow
The How-To Manual That Anyone Can Write or Edit
How to Win a Street Fight
Although the best way to 'win' a street fight is to avoid one, we are not always so lucky. There are many fighting techniques around to deal with combat, should it come down to that, but taking a martial art or self-defense class doesn't guarantee your safety. This is a guide to help you in making simple, deliberate actions to end the fight.
Steps
- Try walking or talking your way out of it. Most people are only trying to establish a "tough," respected image. Nevertheless, don't "tip your hand" by letting them know your intentions in any given situation. If you can resolve a dispute without having to trade blows, do so, but don't invite a fight by looking weak, backing away too quickly, or showing too much fear or anxiety. Don't let your ego (or lack of it) become a liability to your safety.
- Know when and how to run:
- If you are outmatched or outnumbered, or just not willing to fight, then run with the first opportunity.
- Try to run towards public, well-lit areas where there will be others.
- Be aware of your environment:
- Aside from various objects that can be used as weapons and traps, knowing where to run is very important--especially when you're outnumbered.
- Use all of your senses fully. Don't just look around directly--use shadows and reflections to your advantage. Keep your ears open as well.
- Err on the side of caution, by assuming the following:
- Your opponent is a better fighter, and has back-up.
- He/she has a blunt or edged weapon, such as brass knuckles or a knife.
- You will be hit. This is less of an assumption than a certainty, if you keep fighting after being hurt, you are less likely to submit.
- Keep your guard up. Even if it's only by extending your hands in a 'stay-back' type pose, it places something between you and your opponent. Nevertheless, do not allow your hands to become too far extended to harm either balance or striking ability. Also, do not allow the opponent to grab your hands or arms (break the grip with a quick rotation in the "weak" direction toward the opponent's thumbs) as either your balance or your orientation (by the cross-arm pull) may be easily compromised.
- Stay roughly two arms' length (about five and a half to six feet) from your opponent, allowing the distance to shorten only to attack or counter an opponent.
- Try to stay on an opponent's 'outside' (i.e. towards the side, rather than directly in front). Remember that they can be an obstacle to themselves.
- If fighting more than one opponent, move in such a way as to keep them in each other's way. Don't stay between them, and if possible limit the directions they can attack from.
- Attempt to evade an attack completely. Simply blocking an opponent with your arms or legs leaves the rest of your body in the way.
- Stay on your feet. Going to ground is very dangerous to the untrained fighter, especially if they have weapons, back-up or ground-fighting experience. Conversely, it is to your advantage to have your opponent(s) on the ground. Watch your opponent's balance for over-extension or other instabilities, and then quickly put him on the ground.
- Equally, minimize grappling time, as such opens windows of opportunities and exposure to other fighters. As arresting attacks tend to grappling, use leverage to put the aggressor on the ground.
- Balance is key. Keep your balance, and attack your opponents' balance when you can. Limit the opponent's movement of the feet and/or legs with your own feet and legs, move the opponent off balance, and protect your own balance by breaking the opponent's grip and by striking at the face (for instant disorientation during the fall).
- Attack any open, vulnerable spot without exposing too much of yourself. Damage to the face, temples, throat, kidneys, solar plexus, etc. may eventually incapacitate your opponent. Strategic strikes to the groin, the back of the head (temporarily disrupts vision), the knees, and the eyes are particularly effective without requiring much force, effort, or time. Attack the eyes with sand, dirt, mace, or other sprays. Fight, pursuit, and flight are all equally ineffective without sight (even temporarily).
- Phone the police or alert some other authority, even if you do escape. If you're in a club, and someone is up for a fight, find a bouncer. The 'fighter' may not just be looking at you for a fight. Such authorities are here to protect people, and are trained in dealing with this sort of thing.
- Remember in order of priority: walk, talk, fight. Fighting is an absolute last resort.
Tips
- Keep calm. If you need to, breathe deeply. If you know how to clear your head, do so. Unwanted distractions will only make you more likely to get hurt.
- If someone else is better trained at dealing with this situation, leave it to them. Don't try to interfere, as you may end up causing more trouble. Follow any reasonable commands they give you.
- If attempting to escape in the 'middle' of a confrontation, you should ideally kick, trip, or send opponents off balance before running.
- Keep things simple. Fights in films are choreographed. Real ones aren't.
- Attacks from behind are difficult to see and avoid, and in a real fight, it is not 'cowardly' to strike from behind. Watch your back, and attack that of your opponent(s).
- Many of the weakest spots are down the 'center-line' of the body (i.e. down an imaginary line drawn from forehead to groin). Take advantage of this in offense and defense, and try to face an opponent almost side-on, as it makes your 'center-line' more difficult to attack.
- Be aware of the 'zones' of fighting (from the most distant); weapons, feet, hands, knees, elbows, grappling.
- Think before you act. Only employ an attack, grab, or other offensive technique when you are almost certain it will work the way you want it to.
Warnings
- High kicks are rarely a good idea, especially if your opponent is untangled. Keep them below the waist for best effect.
- Fighting can cause injury or death, and land you in jail. Conversely, ineffective fighting can cost your life at the end of the day.
- This guide is presented as an assistant for a difficult situation, and is not intended as a substitute for actual martial arts training. If you are concerned with learning to defend yourself against physical violence, find a reputable self-defense class in your area. If you do not know where to begin, consider asking at your local police station.
China buys Google | The Register
China buys Google
Mu Shu Porked
Published Saturday 1st April 2006 04:24 GMT
Exclusive The People's Republic of China has acquired a controlling stake in the United States' fastest growing technology company, Google.
Google announced the transfer of 140m shares of Class B stock to a new entity owned by the Chinese Ministry of Information in typically forthright style. The news was disclosed in a Captcha graphic on its Google Canteen Menu weblog; investors had to click a hidden link to see the announcement, and then decode a stenographically-hidden message watermarked into the JPG file. Once decrypted, the message read:
gee it's raining here in mountain view and my cats hungry so we thought we'd better update you on our corporate finances. we've sold out to china. have a great weekend boo-yah!! lol
No other details were forthcoming.
The deal raises urgent national security questions, a six month investigation by The Register's Silicon Valley staff can reveal.
Amongst the assets acquired by the Chinese government is NASA's Ames Research Center. Google announced a partnership with Ames last year, and, as it turns out, the move laid the groundwork for the takeover by the PRC. The Chinese will gain control of the world's largest wind tunnels - devices that when opened up could be used to push the smell of Mu Shu Pork across much of Silicon Valley, or conversely be used to spread avian bird flu, or mind-altering substances.
Ministry of Information officials were conducting examinations at the Ames facility today, and requested rush hour traffic on the adjacent Highway 101 be re-routed. Caltrans officials agreed to the request.
President Bush uses Ames as his landing pad for Northern California visits and is expected to do so under the Chinese ownership.
"The Chinese make the blankets, headphones, chopsticks, stereos and tires on Air Force One," said White House spokesman, Scott McLellan. "I don't see why they can't land the damn thing too."
How we didn't break the news
It was a picture taken by a Register reader from inside the Chinese Propaganda Ministry six months ago that prompted our investigation. The shot appeared to show Government artists harnessing the youthful charisma of Google's founders for a productivity campaign.
Only when we saw further evidence of the artwork did the penny drop.
[ Click to unblur]
Google's founders have reciprocated the gesture, and as this photograph ahead of today's official announcement shows, they are making extraordinary efforts to have the company's new management feel at home.
[ Click to see excellent Plastic Sergey-ry ]
The cosmetic surgeon who supplied the evidence confirmed the operations had been successful.
Our investigations suggest that Google has been working on behalf of the People's Republic for many years. Its activities include collecting data on US citizens - Google recently fought a US government request to hand over its data in the courts - and owning key parts of the nation's communications infrastructure.
In fact, security analysts who've seen the evidence suggest that Google is little more than a PRC front organization.
Behind the colored balls
The roots of the Google/China conspiracy can be traced back to Sergey Brin's father Michael Brin. The Russian-born mathematician grew disaffected with the USSR's brand of communism and joined an elite task force of communist China sympathizers operating out of Moscow. Members of the organization - Chinuks - would pass messages to each other inside of plastic, colored balls. Their shared mission was to revive a purer Maoist form of Communism in China, and they planned to aid the country through technology advances.
Sergey grew up learning the ways of the Chinuks and from an early age committed himself to bringing Michael's dreams to fruition.
A team of Chinuks worked with Sergey for fifteen years to create a search algorithm powerful enough to attract hundreds of millions of people to their product. The Chinuks and Brin managed to convince Stanford, and later German Andy Bechtolsheim, to fund their efforts. The group also handpicked Larry Page as an American patsy to distract attention away from their dark ambitions, and then cemented the masquerade by hiring a retired teacher, Eric Schmidt.
Until early this week, Schmidt had no idea he was fronting a data gathering operation for a foreign power, and had told friends and family he was supervising an after hours therapy center for local children suffering from Asperger's Syndrome.
Billions of dollars and a steady supply of crayons have kept Page and Schmidt quiet.
In peril: Our Nation's Youth
The Register's investigation has turned up evidence that Google has been feeding data on US citizens to China for years. But more disturbingly, psychological experts and economists are concerned that Google's enthusiasm for addictive and distracting technologies such as "Web 2.0" will fatally sap US productivity for years to come.
"It's the Opium Wars in reverse," said one former national security adviser, speaking under condition of anonymity.
The deal also compromises the United States' lead in the strategically vital areas of blogging software, AJAX-powered PowerPoint clones, and dysfunctional video services of cats falling out of trees.
Glimpses of what the new Google website looks like can be seen here.
[ Click to see Great Leap Forward in Search Quality ]
Even Google's Maps has not escaped the PRC-initiated makeover. International policy relations experts tonight expressed concern about some of the changes:
[ Click to see Ominous Warning ]
Coincidentally, today, the Chinese news service Xinhua reported that dot com era publisher John Battelle has been appointed to the Ministry of Information's Propaganda Unit. ®
[Thanks to Splinter Products for the shots from inside the Chinese Propanda Ministry, and inside the Sergeyry.]
Microsoft Patents Ones, Zeroes | The Onion - America's Finest News Source
Microsoft Patents Ones, Zeroes | The Onion - America's Finest News Source: "Microsoft Patents Ones, Zeroes
March 25, 1998 | Issue 33?11
REDMOND, WA?In what CEO Bill Gates called 'an unfortunate but necessary step to protect our intellectual property from theft and exploitation by competitors,' the Microsoft Corporation patented the numbers one and zero Monday.
Enlarge ImageMicrosoft Patents 01
At a press conference beamed live to Microsoft shareholders around the globe, Bill Gates announces the company's patenting of the binary system.
With the patent, Microsoft's rivals are prohibited from manufacturing or selling products containing zeroes and ones?the mathematical building blocks of all computer languages and programs?unless a royalty fee of 10 cents per digit used is paid to the software giant.
'Microsoft has been using the binary system of ones and zeroes ever since its inception in 1975,' Gates told reporters. 'For years, in the interest of the overall health of the computer industry, we permitted the free and unfettered use of our proprietary numeric systems. However, changing marketplace conditions and the increasingly predatory practices of certain competitors now leave us with no choice but to seek compensation for the use of our numerals.'
A number of major Silicon Valley players, including Apple Computer, Netscape and Sun Microsystems, said they will challenge the Microsoft patent as monopolistic and anti-competitive, claiming that the 10-cent-per-digit licensing fee would bankrupt them instantly.
'While, technically, Java is a complex system of algorithms used to create a platform-independent programming environment, it is, at its core, just a string of trillions of ones and zeroes,' said Sun Microsystems CEO Scott McNealy, whose company created the Java programming environment used in many Internet applications. 'The licensing fees we'd have to pay Microsoft every day would be approximately 327,000 times the total net worth of this compa"
March 25, 1998 | Issue 33?11
REDMOND, WA?In what CEO Bill Gates called 'an unfortunate but necessary step to protect our intellectual property from theft and exploitation by competitors,' the Microsoft Corporation patented the numbers one and zero Monday.
Enlarge ImageMicrosoft Patents 01
At a press conference beamed live to Microsoft shareholders around the globe, Bill Gates announces the company's patenting of the binary system.
With the patent, Microsoft's rivals are prohibited from manufacturing or selling products containing zeroes and ones?the mathematical building blocks of all computer languages and programs?unless a royalty fee of 10 cents per digit used is paid to the software giant.
'Microsoft has been using the binary system of ones and zeroes ever since its inception in 1975,' Gates told reporters. 'For years, in the interest of the overall health of the computer industry, we permitted the free and unfettered use of our proprietary numeric systems. However, changing marketplace conditions and the increasingly predatory practices of certain competitors now leave us with no choice but to seek compensation for the use of our numerals.'
A number of major Silicon Valley players, including Apple Computer, Netscape and Sun Microsystems, said they will challenge the Microsoft patent as monopolistic and anti-competitive, claiming that the 10-cent-per-digit licensing fee would bankrupt them instantly.
'While, technically, Java is a complex system of algorithms used to create a platform-independent programming environment, it is, at its core, just a string of trillions of ones and zeroes,' said Sun Microsystems CEO Scott McNealy, whose company created the Java programming environment used in many Internet applications. 'The licensing fees we'd have to pay Microsoft every day would be approximately 327,000 times the total net worth of this compa"
Microsoft Buys OpenOffice.org!
OpenOffice.org: Home: "Microsoft Buys OpenOffice.org!"
For an undisclosed sum reputed to be in the billions, Microsoft's Bill Gates has personally bought the leading open-source desktop project. Saying he 'was sick and tired of open-source eating away at his profits,' the world's richest man decided to put an end to the nuisance and simply buy OpenOffice.org. It will form part of a growing list of Microsoft acquisitions, including several erstwhile competitors, a considerable number of prominent politicians, and a few small governments.
The initially stunned OpenOffice.org community--a happy-go-lucky international band numbering in the hundreds of thousands--later turned to champagne to celebrate their newfound wealth. 'Bless Bill!' one happy Torontonian exclaimed, bubbly in hand. 'With all this money, I can beat Mark's time in orbit!'
Gates has assured all current OpenOffice.org users that their future migration path to Microsoft Office is guaranteed thanks to OpenOffice.org's faultless support of MS Office files formats. Users can further rest assured that the full functionality currently provided by OpenOffice.org 2.0 will be available in MS-Office 2020 - or possibly 2030.
* Full Press Release"
For an undisclosed sum reputed to be in the billions, Microsoft's Bill Gates has personally bought the leading open-source desktop project. Saying he 'was sick and tired of open-source eating away at his profits,' the world's richest man decided to put an end to the nuisance and simply buy OpenOffice.org. It will form part of a growing list of Microsoft acquisitions, including several erstwhile competitors, a considerable number of prominent politicians, and a few small governments.
The initially stunned OpenOffice.org community--a happy-go-lucky international band numbering in the hundreds of thousands--later turned to champagne to celebrate their newfound wealth. 'Bless Bill!' one happy Torontonian exclaimed, bubbly in hand. 'With all this money, I can beat Mark's time in orbit!'
Gates has assured all current OpenOffice.org users that their future migration path to Microsoft Office is guaranteed thanks to OpenOffice.org's faultless support of MS Office files formats. Users can further rest assured that the full functionality currently provided by OpenOffice.org 2.0 will be available in MS-Office 2020 - or possibly 2030.
* Full Press Release"
sabato, aprile 01, 2006
Microsoft to release Vista with a Linux kernel
The Tech Journal » Microsoft to release Vista with a Linux kernel: "Microsoft to release Vista with a Linux kernel April 1, 2006
After years of delays and months of rewriting code the Microsoft Corporation has taken a new direction with Windows Vista. Microsoft will release Vista with a Linux kernel. At the press conference Bill Gates had this to say 'We are very excited at the new direction of Windows Vista. With help from Novell and IBM we have leveraged the Linux kernel and have built our GUI as a Window Manager on top of X.org. This brings the friendliness and usability model of our Windows operating system and married it to the stability and rock solid security of Linux.' When asked why Microsoft took this route Jim Allchin said ' For years our competitors and business partners have been telling us they want everything the Linux kernel offers. It was the right thing to do.' Allchin also had this to say 'With such great work being done in the Open Source community we also will be using OpenOffice.org as the base of our Office 12.' When asked how long the delays would be to bring these products to market Gates said 'What delays? 90% of the work is done for us and we didnt have to pay, this cuts our development costs and time to market considerably.'
Linus Torvalds took the stage and after a heartwarming embrace of Bill Gates Linus had these remarks, 'Its so wonderful that Microsoft has taken our work and used it to bring to market this incredible new OS. I am ecstatic of these changes'
It has been confirmed that Linus will start a new job at Microsoft as the President of Platform Strategies. When asked of his new job at Microsoft Linus said 'OSDL wasnt doing anything to help Linux along, all they did was siphon money off of our key members. Im very excited at the direction Microsoft plans to take Linux and finally feel Im in the presence of people that care.'
The new OS will be available under Microsofts"
After years of delays and months of rewriting code the Microsoft Corporation has taken a new direction with Windows Vista. Microsoft will release Vista with a Linux kernel. At the press conference Bill Gates had this to say 'We are very excited at the new direction of Windows Vista. With help from Novell and IBM we have leveraged the Linux kernel and have built our GUI as a Window Manager on top of X.org. This brings the friendliness and usability model of our Windows operating system and married it to the stability and rock solid security of Linux.' When asked why Microsoft took this route Jim Allchin said ' For years our competitors and business partners have been telling us they want everything the Linux kernel offers. It was the right thing to do.' Allchin also had this to say 'With such great work being done in the Open Source community we also will be using OpenOffice.org as the base of our Office 12.' When asked how long the delays would be to bring these products to market Gates said 'What delays? 90% of the work is done for us and we didnt have to pay, this cuts our development costs and time to market considerably.'
Linus Torvalds took the stage and after a heartwarming embrace of Bill Gates Linus had these remarks, 'Its so wonderful that Microsoft has taken our work and used it to bring to market this incredible new OS. I am ecstatic of these changes'
It has been confirmed that Linus will start a new job at Microsoft as the President of Platform Strategies. When asked of his new job at Microsoft Linus said 'OSDL wasnt doing anything to help Linux along, all they did was siphon money off of our key members. Im very excited at the direction Microsoft plans to take Linux and finally feel Im in the presence of people that care.'
The new OS will be available under Microsofts"
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